Every time that we take out the Sefer Torah in Shul we state a phrase worth contemplating. “V’Yigar B’Yetzer Harah Min Ha’Nisuin, (please Hashem, help us) banish the Evil Inclination from our Nisuin”.
There are two interpretations of the word “Nisuin”. One is “from our daily occupations and involvements”. The second is “from our marriage”.
What is being said here? Why do we specifically daven for this request before taking out the Sefer Torah?
The Yetzer Harah desires for us to sin and for us to be unhappy. He thus tells us to give in to our egos and to thereby suffer from a miserable marriage. “One who dwells without a wife is without Torah, protection from sin and happiness…” (Yevamos 62b). Hence, the Yetzer Harah doesn’t want shalom bayis, peace in the home.
It is precisely at this time (Pesichah, opening of the Aron) that we daven for Hashem’s help in this matter. Firstly, because the Zohar states that when the Aron is opened, it is an auspicious time to pray and be answered. Secondly, because the solution for how to have peace and know how to treat ones’ spouse properly is by learning Torah. Torah teaches us sensitivity, consideration and how to care for others!
This is the meaning of the Gemara in Sanhedrin (92a), “any home where the voice of Torah isn’t heard at night, fire will consume it”! This is the fire of Machlokes, arguments, anger and frustration. If one learns Torah and takes in its beautiful lessons, he will know how to treat and care for his wife! (See Sotah 17a for proof: “without marital harmony, fire consumes them”! We are striving for the positive: “if they act properly, the Shechinah dwells with them!)
May Hashem answer all of our prayers for peace and success!